Just when you are beginning to get over some of the pain and heartache of the breakup and feel it is time to move on, your ex boyfriend calls you. He is friendly and asks how you are doing, but he does not say he wants to get back together. Now you are wondering what to do. The answer to that question is easy. Do nothing.
There are many reasons an ex boyfriend might contact you. He might be missing you and wanting you back, but don't count on it. When your ex calls you and asks how you are doing, he is probably testing the water. You do not want to seem anxious to talk to him. Do not mention the word love or tell him how much you miss him.
If he is truly interested in getting back together, and you do not let him know if you are dating or not, he will try to find out from your friends. This is why it is best to not let your friends know how much you want your ex back. They will be able to tell your ex they do not know what you are doing. The more you can keep him guessing, the better chance you will have of getting your ex boyfriend back.
Another reason an ex boyfriend will contact you after a breakup, is to keep you hopeful. He wants to be sure you will be sitting at home, feeling lonely and waiting for his call. By knowing you are waiting for him, it gives him the freedom to have fun, date other women and if nothing works out, he will have you waiting. When this happens, you become nothing more than his backup girlfriend.
By becoming a backup girlfriend you will actually lose his respect. He will call you now and then and might even date you from time to time. But sooner or later, he will find some other woman that will capture his heart and you will lose him for good. If you want to get your ex boyfriend back, you cannot sit around and wait for him.
When your ex boyfriend contacts you, you have to use some male psychology and make yourself unavailable. When you do not take his calls or answer his email, you will begin to push his emotional hot buttons. He will soon realize that you do not plan on being his backup girlfriend. In fact he will begin to think you do not want him at all.
By making him think you are moving on, your ex boyfriend will see that he has a very good chance of losing you. If he really loves you, he will begin to think of wanting you back. If he does not love you, you are better off with out him. Either way, it is better than becoming a backup girlfriend.